Just a dog.
Chapter 1 – Wanna be an Olympian
Ian, who was a rather fetching golden Labrador, lived with his long suffering owners, Mandy and Tom. They had found Ian as a puppy, scavenging for food. They had taken pity on him, and took him under their wing. Now, as a unfortunate consequence of lots of pampering, Ian had grown rather fat. Of course, he was the apple of his owners’ eyes, and, so, he was never fat in their eyes. In real life, he was a bit of a podge.
One day, Ian overheard his owners talking about the Olympics! WowyZowy! Ian had always wanted to go to the Olympics, and here was his big chance. 1 day later, he had finished packing. At night (after his doggie chocolate milk and cookies,)he set out in search of the Olympics. Sadly after about 3 steps, he was caught. Poor Mandy and Tom. After a strong cup of tea each, they went into the living room to decide what to do…
Nervously, Ian stepped into the living room.
“I’m so sorry! I only want to compete in the Olympics! “He said. Mandy (surprisingly) smiled at him
“We’ve decided to help you achieve your ambition, dear.” Ian couldn’t contain his happiness. He almost flew because he was so happy, until his owners told him to stop. Ian tried to fly anyway, and consequently smacked his head on the fireplace. (Ouch!)
His owners had been hard at work making something (well- actually Tom was) but they had told them it would be ready soon- what was it?….
Chapter 2- A bit of panic…
At last! The time had come! Ian had been waiting for ages, and Ian was ecstatic! Tom stood back, covered in sawdust and he had a massive grin on his face. Ian opened the oak handle (this was a trick he had learnt lately ) and gasped, taken back with joy. His very own training room! Steppers, weights…you name it, it was there! Joyfully, Ian thanked his owners, before running into the room like a flash of lightning to train…
Sometimes, Ian’s owners forgot that Ian was there, because now, he spent very little time with them. He was usually training with his dumbells or with his weights… the only time he ever came out of his room was for breakfast, lunch and dinner! Soon he was as strong as a elephant! Then- it happened- the day. When it all went wrong…
Ian was playing against the best tennis player in town.
“I am so worried!” He cried. It was a even draw. The tension got higher, and higher, and…. Ian won! He felt like he was a super hero. But then he realised that only Mandy and Tom were cheering. The townsfolk cried,
“It’s not fair! Our best tennis player was beaten by a stupid dog!” Ian almost cried, it was so unfair. Just because he was a dog, it didn’t mean that he couldn’t do anything! Then, at that moment, he decided to prove to everyone that just because he was a dog, it didn’t mean that he couldn’t win…
Chapter 3- “yawn!”
Despite his bad impression on the townsfolk, Ian was generally nice to the townsfolk, (even if they were not nice to him.)He would spend most of his day, admittedly, training but, he allowed himself 10 minutes each day to try and ‘make friends’ with the townsfolk . It was not working, despite his efforts! Little did poor Ian know, but the townsfolk were devising a plan so awful that it would sent shivers down your spine, so bloodcurdlingly awful that on the fateful night of ‘the plot’ cries of children could be heard. Yes, it was that bad.
This dreaded plan went like this. They would devise a sleeping potion (made by the local voodoo hoodoo – a male witch ) and give it to Ian as a ‘ apology from the town!’ He would then drink it (of course) and- low and behold-
He would’ve swallowed a sleeping potion so strong, that, right in the middle of the match, he would fall into a sleep so deadly, he would fall asleep for at least 3 weeks. And that, was the dastardly plot about to commence.
Ian walked happily along the road when Mandy, a girl with piercing green eyes who had not spoken to him for days, greeted him pleasantly by saying,
“Well hello, Ian. Do you want to go to a restaurant with the rest of the town as a apology for being so horrid? “ Of course, Ian immediately said yes, because it isn’t every day that a dog goes to a restaurant, is it?
The meal went quite well, and then Albert Fake,( more commonly known as A.Fake) produced a pure white bottle, and smiled a slippery smile , as smooth and sleek as silk. He said,
”Now, as a final apology, we should like to give you this delicious bottle of apple juice ( his favourite!)” and passed it to him. Ian drank it in one, big, gulp. Immediately he felt as though he had a fire work display let rip inside him. It was quite a time before he felt alright again.
“That was some apple juice!” he gasped.
“Yes, the brands are getting stronger.” Mandy said.
Of course, you must realise that only a tiny bit was poured in, and mixed with apple juice to see if it worked. They had put the potion in his drink bottle (which was exactly the same as his opponents!) When Ian drank the potion, he would get sleepier, and sleepier, until he fell asleep! It was a fool proof plan.
Then- one day later- the two opponents took a drink from their bottles…
Chapter 4- zzzz
After taking a drink from their bottle, both opponents faced each other in the tennis court, underneath the blazing hot sun. Both were fierce tennis players, both wanted to win the match. And both took tennis very seriously. Two figures, waiting for someone to serve. Finally they agreed that Ian would serve.
He took his position, gingerly.
“Now, I want this to be a clean game,” said the umpire. Gulping nervously, he began to pick up his painted silver tennis racquet. Then- he served the ball- the game began! They played fiercely, never taking their eyes off the ball. Who would win- whoever did- the other was going to be pretty mad! But, slowly, but surely, they began to slow down.
The townsfolk looked at each other, confused. Why hadn’t Ian fallen asleep yet? And why wasn’t Ian’s opponent not looking tired- it was a mystery!
The townsfolk puzzled, and puzzled, and thought , and puzzled a bit more, but little did he know, a couple of days ago, something very bad happened, ( for them ) and so, this minor problem would change what happened with their imaginary war with Ian…
Chapter 5- The truth is revealed!
Mandy had been listening to her fellow townsfolk , and had been horrified by the terrible plan. Just before the game , she had whispered into Ian’s ear . But what was Mandy’s plan? Well, it went something like this…
Her plan had been rather simple. She had swapped round the opponents bottle with Ian’s ( don’t ask me how- I don’t know) and, so, therefore , the water bottle that the townsfolk had so carefully poured into Ian’s water bottle was now failing. Now, the last part of Mandy’s clever plot was for Ian to pretend he was almost asleep and then- well then , that’s where the exiting part happened…
Well, underneath the hot enough to fry bacon on in 0.000001 seconds sun, Ian’s eyelids were getting heavier, and heavier, until… PING! Ian’s eyelids snapped open and he carried on playing with enough energy to lift a 10,000 ton elephant .
He won the match in no time at all, he had won the match. He celebrated by eating at a really posh pizza place, with Ben and Jerry’s ice cream at London.
“What a brilliant day!” laughed Ian.
“I know dear.” grinned Mandy.
Ian couldn’t rest. He felt like the whole world was up against him. His neighbours kept on giving him funny looks, the tennis player that he beat was ballistic, and even the birds aimed at him for a’ special present ‘ . He was down in the dumps. “Hopefully,” he thought, “Things will be better tomorrow.” And with that thought still lingering in his mind, he went to sleep with a big smile on his face.
In the morning, his head throbbed like mad, and, to make matters worse, his only tennis raquet was missing. He growled angrily, like a lion. He searched high, and he searched low, but all in vain. In the end, he broke down like a broken rag doll, and he cried. Eventually, Mandy heard him and asked him what the matter was. Ian told her, teary eyed, and making the occasional sniff. But, for the first time in his life, Mandy was unsympathetic. All that she said was,
” Well, it’s not me who’s paying for a new one, anyway.” And with that, she stalked off, unmoved by Ian’s heartbroken sobs.
Chapter 7- Guilty.
Over the course of the day, Ian looked for his tennis racquet high and low. He turned the house inside out, then he turned it outside in. Of course, the result was always the same. He couldn’t find his tennis racquet anywhere. Until, in the last couple of hours of his quest, he found that Albert Poppy kettle, one of the kinder townsfolk, pulled him to one side, and spoke to him in a hushed whisper.
“Ummmm…well… you know the old cow shed?“ whispered Albert gingerly looking around.
“Uhu,” nodded Ian.
“Well…just mull things over in the cow shed. “And, with those final words, Albert was gone.
Puzzled, Ian thought for exactly 2 hours 10 minutes, and 5 seconds. And, then, he thought of an answer. Immediately, he set off towards his destination. He was 100 per cent sure that he was right. He had to be- but- the question was- was he?
As Ian jogged (well-actually ran) to the old cow shed , relief flooded through him. Then, he arrived at his destination. Ian searched high, north, south, and all the other directions of the compass. But all in vain. No sign of a tennis racquet.
After being tormented by despair for a while, Ian thought. Well…the local green house was called the shed and cows were always grazing in it…happily, Ian ran as fast as his 4 legs would carry him, to the shed. Soon, the faint outline of the green house came into sight. It drew nearer, and nearer to him, until- CRASH! Ian toppled over and rubbed his sore nose. “Ow!” He said to no one in particular. Then, the great hunt for the mighty tennis racquet commenced.
Ian searched, and searched, until he found, to his delight, that his tennis racquet was hidden in a massive carrot pot. Joyfully, he wiped away a bit of dirt, and started making his way home.
Chapter 9- A hero!
Of course, Mandy and Tom forgave Ian instantly, so, effectively, everything went back too normal. (For example: Ian’s owners pampering him non-stop.) And Ian set back to work, training. Then- the Olympics commenced!
Ian, after training so hard, won a gold medal in 52 minutes flat. He had made a new world record! All over the world, dogs cheered. For, when this fantastic moment commenced, Ian made history. Now, dogs , every 5 and a half years, they have a dog Olympics. Every dog owner in the world gather, and, their dogs compete to see who is best.
Chinchillas compete to see who is the smallest. Alsatians have a beauty competition with the poodles, and, Jack Rustles run to see who is fastest, and, of course, Labradors have a tennis match. And every time, before their big game, the dogs cry,
“Long live Ian, the one who made this happen!” And without further ado, they start the games.